Stealing a meme

This was stolen from Sarah. Strangely, I feel no guilt.

I am: not quite content.

I want: So many things.

I have: More than I deserve.

I wish: I could forget some things, and remember others.

I hate: People that will not accept responsibility for their actions.

I hear: The Who singing “Won’t Get Fooled Again”

I search: For enlightenment.

I wonder: What next?

I regret: Not so much regret, but I miss my Dad. His birthday was this month, and I’ve been thinking about him a lot.

I love: Right now, I love a good project that can hold my attention.

I miss: See above.

I always : I always will accept a challenge.

I am not: timid, shy, etc.

I dance: rarely.

I sing: badly, but with great joy.

I cry: Very rarely, and in private.

I win: more often than I think I do.

I misplace: My calm, with amazing regularity.

I need: some more wire. 16 gauge brass, for preference . About 20 pounds of it.

I would: slap George Bush. Repeatedly

I should: stop thinking and start doing.

Monday Meandering.

So, in yesterday’s post I was blathering on about my desire to get back into my pre-Gulf Wars routines. I didn’t mention writing in this blog in yesterday’s post because, frankly, I had gotten out of the regular habit of doing so long before Gulf Wars. However, I really want to get back into the habit of posting here.

I think part of the reason I had fallen out of the habit of writing and posting here is due to the fact that I am not really sure what I want this Blog to be. I have an easier time stating what I don’t want it to be:

1. I don’t want it be nothing more than a collection of links to other sites.
2. I don’t want it to be mindless drivel, or, worse, ….
3. I don’t want it to be a rant Blog. I don’t want to be continually ranting about something here. Unfortunately, I can, and often do rant a lot. I am fairly good at it. I’m a cynical, sarcastic smart ass, and I’m not ashamed to admit it. But I don’t want to be known for ONLY being a cynical, sarcastic smart ass.
4. Finally, I want this place to be more than a mere recounting of my day to day activities. For the most part I find my day to day activities to be quite boring, and I would guess that most people would find them to be equally boring.

Now, a lot of the blogs I read regularly are dedicated to a particular theme, or interest. So, I got to thinking about my main interests.  I read a lot of SCA  related blogs ( Or at least blogs written by a lot of people I know in the SCA). I also have begun reading a lot of jewelry related blogs as I have become more and more interested in learning to make different kinds of jewelry. I also read  a ton of blogs and websites relating to books, as I am and always have been an avid reader.

So, with all that in mind, I guess I’ll be writng about books, jewelry -or, more accurately, my attempt to learn to make jewelry, and the SCA. I’m not sure what Cormac’s Corner will end up being, but I look forward to finding out.

Day 2 of Habit Rebuilding

It is Sunday night, and I feel good. I have no real reason for feeling that way, but I also have no real reason for not feeling good. Since feeling good is less work than feeling bad, and since I am by nature a lazy person, I have chosen to feel good

I finally feel that I have gotten back on my non-Gulf Wars schedule. One week of a week long SCA event can, and does, really miss with a person’s schedule. The first week back was the hardest; I was so sleep deprived I was literally falling asleep at my desk. My corporate overlords do not find that to be acceptable behavior, so it was a rather challenging week.

By the start of the second week, I had managed to get caught up on my sleep; I was no longer sleeping at my desk. It was all the other aspects of my regular life that were still out of wack. I had fallen off my diet during war week. Now, I didn’t go hog wild, or anything like that while I was at War, but I had stopped consciously thinking about what I was eating. During the week in Lumberton I had gotten out of the habit of thinking about what I was eating.

During the week at Gulf Wars I had also lost the habit of tracking my spending. Several months ago, in an effort to be a bit smarter about financial matters, and in an effort to find ways to save money, I had started recording all my spending. I didn’t do that at Gulf Wars. Now, this was not a big deal for the first half of the week, because I quite literally didn’t really have any money to spend. However, once my paycheck and quota bonus checks were direct deposited, and once I discovered that most of the merchants would in fact take my debit card, I went kind of nuts.

I had also gotten out of the habit of engaging in a daily goal setting and review. Such daily sessions were, and are, a ritual I had been building in my life since last October. I have found it very, very, helpful in keeping me on track and moving forward toward achieving my goals. Normally the Daily Review and Goal setting is the last thing I do before going to bed. I review the days “Get It Done” list to see what I did get accomplished that day, and what I did not. Then I create the “Get it Done” list for the next day. I didn’t do any of that at the War, and by the time I got home, the habit I had built for five months was gone.

Now, not doing my daily review, not paying attention to my diet, and not tracking my spending, none of these things were a big deal while at War. I mean, it’s my vacation. People are allowed to be a little lax on their vacations. Right? No, the real problem lies with the fact that I didn’t start doing them again when I got home. I let my lack of self discipline at war carry on, and that is, not acceptable. I really wish I could claim that I wasn’t aware of what I was doing, but I just don’t lie that well. I knew what I was doing – or, more accurately, what I wasn’t doing. What I can say is that the fact that I wasn’t doing what I new I should be doing was bugging me. It was like an itch that wouldn’t scratch. Day by day, the feeling of something not being right kept growing.  Kept getting more annoying.

This weekend that feeling finally got to be more annoying than I could deal with. So, I dealt with it by rededicating myself to doing all of those things again.  I started yesterday by recording what and when I eat. I didn’t spend any money yesterday, much to my surprise, but I did start recording  expenditures today. Once I’ve finished this blog post, I’ll do my daily review and set my goals for tomorrow. A small start, to be sure, but all great things start small. All of the “self improvement” literature I’ve read says that it takes 21 days to build a habit. I guess today would be day 2 of the habit rebuilding program.