Sometimes the way to victory is to not fight.

I am feeling in a mood for self revelation tonight. The mood to share something about myself that most of you that read this don’t know about me, so here goes: I love a good debate. I’ll go further than that, I love a good argument. I’m good at it.  Hell, I’ve been known to spend three hours debating/arguing one position , the use of the death penalty as an example, then turn around and spend three hours arguing/debating the other side of the same argument.

I know, I know, you are all shocked and surprised. ……surprised by the fact I was able to type the above paragraph with a strait face.  The fact is that anybody and everybody that knows me, has known me for five minutes, knows I rarely back away from an argument. Especially if it is an issue I feel strongly about.

(again reads several dozen posts on the home group email list)…..

But the thing is, for an argument or debate to be a good argument (and to be clear, I’m not talking about BAD arguments, that’s a subject for another time),  both sides have to be willing to truly listen to the other side.  Both sides must be willing to hear what the other side is saying, and must be willing to admit the other side has valid points. Finally, both sides must be willing to believe that the other side is acting honestly, and not trying to hide something, or scamming someone, etc. etc.

(reads the emails again).

When those conditions don’t exist, it is not a “good” argument/debate. It is just name calling, slander, and does nothing but raise suspicion, disrespect, mistrust,  and ill will. This brings me to the thing I really wanted to reveal, what you may not know about me: I have recently come to truly understand that the best way to win an argument or debate, when it is a bad one, is to simply not get drawn into it.